Why didn't I see it before??

What the f*** happened to me today?? I saw her but I didn't make a move to approach her.. Is it true that one should be cautious of what you say? I still remember when I told my ex that she's my first and last, and that I would never be able to recuperate if ever we broke up. Sheesh, we've broken up for almost two years now and I've already moved on. But why is it that when I like someone I tend to shy away? Is it about what I told her that she would be my last? I regret saying that......... I'm not desperate but I need to know who is the right girl for me.. I'll just accept the fact that I won't be able to find her, who ever she is.... The words that I regret on saying has disguised itself as my shyness. So now I won't even bother looking for someone else if that's the case.. I feel like a coward waiting for the right situation instead of manipulating the situation... Oh well I'll just wait..wait...wait....and wait......