Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Nothing to hold me back...

So now the only motivation to keep me forward is myself.. If the recepient's not happy with the determination then who else is but me.. There are lots in my mind for me to dwell on one thing.. Now one aspect is lost and the only way is to shift to another drive.. And that is to concentrate on my fields of interests.. Martial arts, diploma, and writing.. These three won't ever fade so why not stick to them as my main source of motivation? To excel in these fields is what I have in mind and nothing can change that now. If people change so does the certain inspiration associated with it. So if it shifts to something that never changes then that means there is no way to lose such drive. It's like hanging on a ledge that will never crack and the only mode of losing it is not to get a tight grip.. Wherein with a human being it's like holding on a ledge that's made of clay.. Once handled wrong it breaks and you fall on the ground with every living cell in your body gasping for the breath of life once more to be able to climb back up.. Who wants to fall anyways? I don't.. And that gave me the insight that noone can make your dreams but you yourself.. Never depend on a living thing for it breaks and it's never consistent.. The one consistent is what your perception on the things around you.. It is hard to keep a constant determination with humans while physical motivation depends on the one receiving the stimulus. Now it all depends on how I'll keep on my grip on the ledge and not stay there but to move upward. It's either I lossen my grip or fight the fatigue and eventually step on the ledge giving me a warm feeling that I've accomplished the first level.. The finish line is just waiting for me to cross it and hell I will with nothing to trip me on my way for it.. Afterall the three goals of mine mentioned above gives me enough energy to live.. Martial arts: for me to express myself physically and keeps me in shape Writing: to express myself in an abstract manner and to increase my creativity Diploma: a sign of achievement in life and to live in a pleasant road to success.. There is no room to be emotional for it lags the process of obtaining such dreams.. I'm mature enough to be dragged down by something that can never be fixed. If I handled people trying to bring me down coz I'm 20 years old but still in 1st year then this is just like an ant's bite. Every organ in my body's still working perfectly fine so why play dead if I can still stand up. Play the game by the rules and discharge every negative factor that comes in the way even if it takes a blood bath!!!



My bad got it all tied up in a mess and now struggling to be free. Can't go on lying down and getting depressed over my faults. What's done is done and the only way to go is forward. I've learned my lesson to think ten steps ahead before making a move. I'm not afraid to express what I feel but I gained a new knowledge to wait for the right time. To express is to let someone know what you think and how you deal with things. What's wrong with that? It's better to let it out rather than contain it and let the event get all restless. Timing and courage is the key to obtain the desired results.



More work and less sleep!!!!!

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